Day 237 - Another angel has joined the kingdom of Heaven!

My friend, Stephanie Bradley, has joined the kingdom of heaven after a long and hard-fought battle with cancer. She was, and will continue to be, a wonderful spirit. I believe with all of my heart that God put her on this Earth to accomplish something. She apparently has fulfilled her duties and has been called home to Him. I'm not entirely certain what her purpose was in life, and I'm sure that we're not supposed to know....after all, that's what blind Faith is all about. But I do know what Stephanie meant to me:

She isn't the reason that I quit smoking, but she was my motivation. We found out that her oral cancer had metastasized to her lungs in April of this year, and my last cigarette was on April 24th. I had already made the decision to quit, but had not yet committed to a date or made a plan of how I was going to accomplish this goal. Once Stephanie heard that I had decided to quit, she reached out to me and offered her support. This is a woman who has never touched a single cigarette in her life, now suffering from cancer that has spread to her lungs, giving me encouragement! Wow!!! How could I continue to play Russian roulette with my health when Stephanie had done nothing to harm her body and was now suffering from such a horrible infliction? This was the turning point in my life where I decided that the addiction to cigarettes was not going to control me any longer. Thank you, Stephanie, for being a constant reminder and a source of encouragement during my journey to quit smoking.

Other than being a great friend and a source of joy, Stephanie also brought my relationship with God back into the forefront of my life. Watching the way that she and Warner handled the situation with which they were dealt made me realize that I wanted that same strength and peace in my own life. It was amazing to see them in action. Although I cannot imagine how hard it was for them to put a smile on their faces, they did it each and every day. I never once heard a single negative comment about their situation. I took a step back and looked at my own life and how I have a tendency to make the smallest thing into a major deal. Is this really who I want to be? The answer was no. I wondered how it was that these two were able to make it through these past 2 years without just completely falling apart at the seams. I mean, I can be brought to tears sometimes just by coming home from work and realizing that the sink is full of dishes and that I forgot to start the dishwasher the night before! That seems extremely petty when you’re constantly faced with the positive attitudes of close friends who are going through such an ordeal. I’m not sure when it happened, but at some point along the way, I realized that Warner and Stephanie had something that I didn’t at the time; an inner peace and otherworldly strength that can come from none other than a close personal relationship with Him. Once I had this epiphany, I made a vow to myself and my family that we would re-prioritize our lives around God and make Him the forefront of our daily lives. I wish I could say now that I have done this completely and without effort, but I can not. Often times the best and most rewarding things in life are not attained easily. But I can say this; I will strive each and every day to become a better person and servant of the Lord, and I have Stephanie Bradley to thank for that.

We will miss you dearly my friend, but I am comforted to know that you will no longer suffer as you have. You are now safe in His arms; rest in peace.

Here’s to constantly being a work in progress,

God Bless,
The Quitter

Day 229 - When debate turns into a fight!

Anyone who knows me well knows that I really truy hate politics. I've never been one to sit down and debate the merits of this candidate versus that. I do my research at election time, make the best decision that I can given the choices, and then move on down the road.

I'm not saying that those who choose to engage in discussion over politics are somehow doing something wrong, I just don't enjoy it.

Why?

Because I have never seen a single political "discussion" that didn't turn into an all out brawl (unless you count the discussions I've witnessed between my husband and brother-in-law, but those don't count because they agree on most, not all, political and polarizing topics).

I don't agree with my husband on everything. We even disagree on a few very polarizing and important issues, but we've managed to be able to either work through a discussion, or leave that particular topic completely off limits.

I guess what I'm trying to get at people is that we can have healthy debate in this country without going at each others throats all the time. Why is our initial gut reaction always to lash out at someone who holds a different opinion than our own? I'm not saying that I'm perfect....far from it in fact. But when I see something that needs fixing, I try to fix it. And the nature of some "discussions" I have seen as of late need fixing. =)

Let's all start working towards being part of the solution rather than constantly contributing to the problem.

God Bless,
The Quitter

Day 228 - So ridiculous!!!

I just ran across the following article:

http://nbcsports.msnbc.com/id/34288353/ns/sports-golf/

I really wish I could have been looking in a mirror while I read this to see my changing facial expressions.

For example, this excerpt:

"Thankfully, Tiger, you didn't marry a black woman. Because if a sister caught you running around with a bunch of white hoochie-mamas," one parody suggests in song, she would have castrated him.

Seriously? We are all human beings! We don't react differently to situations based on the color of our skin! And the fact that they used the term 'hoochie-mamas' shows their level of intelligence.

Then some blogger stated that if Tiger had cheated on his white wife with a BLACK woman, that the whole situation would be "barely a blip in the blogosphere". WHAT? This has made major news because he's extremely famous and he cheated.....not because of WHO he cheated with.

Then a 26-year-old black woman from NYC said that she doesn't care that Tiger's wife and mistresses are white because he's "quote-unquote not really black". Just what is the definition of black anyway? And more importantly, why does it matter?

This same woman stated later in the article that she would have thought twice about voting for Barack Obama if he had been married to a white woman!! Really? Well it's nice to know that people are out there voting for the Presidency based on who is married to whom!!!

This article is a disgrace to the human race and frankly these people should be ashamed of themselves.

I really hope that one day we as a human race can rise above this, but unless something changes drastically, it won't happen.

God Bless,
The Quitter

Day 215 - Oh the things our children can teach us!

Sorry I haven't blogged in almost a month. Shame on me! I'm not going to type up a bunch of excuses here though.....just didn't get around to it.

Not a lot has happened since I last blogged. I've been out of town for work twice (YUCK!) and accidentally sat at the bar where smoking was allowed in an Outback steakhouse at the airport in Cincinatti (open seating and everything else was full). It really was awesome to sit and smell everyone's nasty smokiness while trying to eat my dinner. Even when I was a smoker I didn't appreciate others smoking while I was tyring to eat. So gross!

Anyway, Jackson's behavior has been just terrible for the past few weeks. Probably because I was out of town and he's trying to punish me. It could also be because he hasn't been feeling well for a few days.

But even with all the crankiness and attitude problems, kids can still find time to teach their parents a few things.

On the way to work this morning, we drove past a construction site. The following is our conversation regarding said construction site:

Jackson: "Mommy, what is that?" (pointing to the construction site)

Me: "It's a construction site."

J: "What does it do?"

Me: "It doesn't do anything, but the tractors and big trucks dig up dirt and rock."

J: "Why?"

Me: "So they can build the foundation for the building that they're putting in."

J: "Oh, I remember, and Jesus is our foundation!"

Me: (slightly surprised as we have never really discussed this with him in detail) "Yes he is."

J: "So did God move all the rocks to build Jesus for us?"

Me: (smiling proudly at my 3 year old) "Yes he did."


This conversation opened my eyes again to the fact that if we put God first, He will make sure that everything else just falls into place. Life will still be hard, but we will have the ability to handle anything because of Him.

God Bless,
The Quitter

Day 186 - Halfway to a Year!

So day 182 was this past Friday, October 23. This day was significant for two reasons.

1) I took the Professional Engineers licensing exam in Edmond. I will find out in 12 weeks if I passed.

2) Marks 6 months of being smoke free.

When I left the testing site for lunch, I didn't realize it, but I had just reached a major milestone. Not in my profession, but in my personal life. 182.5 days is half of 365 days. So basically I've been smoke free for over half a year at this point.

I never would have thought it was possible, but I did it. It feels amazing!

God Bless,
The Quitter

Day 172 - Disgusting Display!

Well I just overheard a co-worker griping about his wife to another co-worker. There are two things wrong with what I just heard:

1) Never ever complain about your marriage to people at work. That's what friends are for. And I know this guy was not simply confiding in a friend, because he blabbed all this in the middle of a congregation of cubicles to at least two listeners (not to mention those who were unintended recipients such as I). I really do not need to know about the goings-on of everyone in my office.

2) The subject matter that he was complaining about just got my blood boiling. You see, he and his wife just had a baby about 3 weeks ago. He was back at work 4 days after the baby was born, which I thought was a little bit strange, but you know, I'm not going to judge. Well apparently he has to go out of town next week and his wife is upset about it. She is a stay-at-home first-time Mom and is mad that her husband has to leave. He told his "buddies" who sit near me that she started reading him the riot act when he informed her of the trip last night. He even used a high-pitched voice when describing the things that she said.

Let me just tell you something here mister! Your wife is on an emotional roller coaster from hell and doesn't know top from bottom right now. What she needs is support you moron!! Yes, you are right that she shouldn't be complaining about a business trip when you are the only one working and supplying money to pay the bills. But she is at home BY HERSELF raising your child. Does this not count for something? Instead of supporting her and loving her, you come to work and blab to everyone about how she "went psycho" on you last night. I'm sure she would be extremely pleased to hear that you did such a thing.

I am truly disgusted at how some men and women treat their spouses. Everyone has arguments and no marriage is perfect. But all disagreements stay at home! A marriage is a private sanctuary where one should feel safe and loved. It's not a discussion point over coffee and doughnuts at work.

Here's to my husband who makes me feel safe and loved.

God Bless,
The Quitter.

Day 168 - Columbus Day

Well Happy Thanksgiving to all you Canadians out there, eh!

I find it a bit comical that Canada's Thanksgiving holiday falls on the same day that the United States celebrates the founding of the Americas by Christopher Columbus. It made ME laugh anyway.

So I haven't updated in awhile, and for good reason. I was on vacation. I had 9 whole blissful days without work. It was wonderful. That being said, it does feel good to be back in the swing of things and into a "normal" routine. I am now convinced that even if I could be a stay-at-home Mom, I would most definitely have to do SOMETHING. Sitting around the house all day doing nothing but planning meals and vacuuming is not for me. I would definitely need a cause of some sort. But I'll stop blabbing on about that since it's not likely to become an issue anytime soon.

Well the PE is in 11 days. I have mixed emotions about this one. On one hand I am terrified and wish I had another month to prepare for the single most important test of my life. On the other hand I am so glad that it is close to being over so I can quit worrying about it. I mean, seriously, it's not life or death.....it's a test. At the end of the day, it's just a test. If I pass it the first time, then that's just great. If not, well the world is not likely to stop spinning on it's axis. I will just take it again (maybe).

My only problem now is going to be pushing through the next 11 days of studying without burning myself out.

Here's to passing this silly thing the first time!

God Bless,
The Quitter